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My mom lives on the south side of Chicago with a one air-conditioning unit to cool her house. So, I asked her if she would want to stay with us knowing that the temperatures will be (and are currently) in the 100’s. She gleefully accepted and has been here since Tuesday.
I forgot what it was like to live with someone addicted to extreme weather conditions. My mom is in love with Tom Skilling, our local weather forecaster, and watches his forecasts religiously. During the winter months, she even goes so far as to telephone me and repeat his forecasts word-for-word.
Well, Chicago’s heat is breaking all kinds of records. This is fantastic news for my mom. Yesterday was the hottest day, with temperatures reaching 103 F and heat index of 112. She loves talking about the extremities and is now continuing to blame everything on the heat.
Act I
Me: Oster isn’t eating as much as he usually does for breakfast.
Mom: It’s because of the heat.
Me: But it’s cool in the house.
Mom: It doesn’t matter. It’s hot outside.
Act II
Me: I think I put too much salt in the egg salad.
Mom: It’s because it’s hot out.
Me: What?!?
Mom: Yeah, your body loses salt in the heat so you should eat more of it to make up for it.
Me: Ummm…what? That doesn’t make any sense.
Mom: Yeah, well…whatever.
There is never a dull moment when my mother is around. She knows her weather obsession is over-the-top and allows us to laugh with her about it (although she’s 100% serious). She has mentioned the heat at least 25 times since she’s been here. She even changes the subject of whatever we are talking about just to talk about the weather.
With most sincere love, I seriously think my mother would be a great Saturday Night Live character.
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